Magic Words

Last month Fiona went through a "please" phase. She'd learned that she could get things she wanted by saying "please" (such as a bite of her parents' breakfast) and that sometimes we wouldn't give her things until she said "please" (such as that bite of her parents' breakfast).

This led to Fiona imagining that she could get just about anything she wanted any time she wanted just by saying "please." "I want a lollipop please"; "I want a bowl please" (i.e. one of the metal kitchen bowls we let her play with); "I want to go outside please"; "I want to climb on the table please." Eventually she figured out that "please" was not a magic word designed to give her everything she wants and we're back to reminding her to say please when she asks for a bite of our breakfast.

This month is all about "I love you." When Fiona is doing something we don't want her to do (e.g. swinging a kitchen towel around so quickly that it winds up hitting us), we tell her to stop. She ignores us, and we get sterner--perhaps grabbing the towel (or similar object) to stop her swinging and telling her to look at us when we speak to her. At that point, Fiona looks whichever parent is reprimanding her in the eye and says "I love you, Daddy" (or Mommy). And then she moves in to try to get a hug, all without having owned up to or having apologized for what she's done.

We don't laugh in front of her, but the transparency of her tactics is amusing. And she usually does get a hug, albeit with a reminder that we still know what she's done ("I love you, too, Fiona, but you still can't swing that dish towel like that"). Even the dimmest parent ought to be able to figure out the machinations of a two year old.